my 180

friday, july 24, 2009.

that’s when it happened. my 180. true I had repented and turned many months ago, but that was the day the Father had me realize that the 180 was complete. Psalm 30:2 states, "O Lord my God, I cried unto thee, and thou hast healed me." I have simply poured my heart out to the Father just like David. I have invited His divine hands to break me, mold me and make me into what He desires. my heart longs after Him. He is my glue.

how did this happen? the Word. the daily diving into the Word (coupled with prayer). Psalm 107:20, "He sent the word, and healed them, and delivered them from their destructions." yes, destructions – i.e. plural. meaning the path I was headed down had more than one snare I could have fallen into. seems King David had more than the one snare of being a whoremonger. if God can heal him why can’t He heal me?

He can only if I allow Him. Psalm 78:41 (this verse will change your life) reads, "Yea, they turned back and tempted God, and limited the Holy One of Israel." Scary! they turned back. they chose NOT to obey God fully. they tempted God. they also chose NOT to trust God fully. plus they limited the Holy One of Israel! they had compacted God into this neat little box. set Him on a shelf. and made Him watch them turn and tempt. they only needed Him for one thing. once that was complete, they disregarded Him all together. that one thing was deliverance. Israel was constantly getting into trouble and relying on God to deliver them. but God was big enough to deliver them AND keep them out of trouble so as to break the cycle!

that is my 180. I by no means am perfect. I am not prideful enough to say I can never return or will ever step away from my Saviour. but what I can tell you is that God Almighty has healed me. my thoughts are no longer plagued by my past life, though the devil tries from time to time (I Cor. 6:11). my desires have been transformed by the renewing of my mind (Rom. 12:2). I have willing placed myself, and continually, under God’s microscope (Prov. 1:23). and my greatest fear is to once again hurt my God and my Redeemer. should that be the fear of the Lord, then it is worth fearing (Prov. 2:5).

my God is so big, so strong and so mighty. there’s nothing my God cannot do. so true is that song. He IS strong enough to pull my sinful soul out of destruction. but ALSO strong enough to keep me close to Him. oh let me no longer limit the Holy One! may God receive the glory for what He has and will do with my life!


old friends

lo and behold I found out an old friend lives in my town. now this old friend knew me quite well prior to returning to God. she and I used to work together at a restaurant and did many things I am not proud of, nor willing to post.

the first thing the devil did was try to get me to return my thoughts to my past. once the Saviour defeated those thoughts, the devil launched into another immoral act. he said, well at least you can masterbate to memories. NO! Romans 12:1 tells us our body, including the mind, is a temple of the Lord.

this was the final giant from my past for God to defeat. it reminds me of David being used by God to smite Goliath in I Samuel 17. what is interesting is that David took 5 smooths stones. now no doubt he believed that God could kill him with just one, but Goliath had 4 brothers. only several years later did David and his mighty men defeat the remaining giants, II Samuel 21:22.

I can honestly say that God has cleaned me up - from the inside out. it is humbling to know that God has extended grace, provided mercy, and in lovingkindness has cleaned up this sinner. then on top of that has led me in His path. Psalm 25:8 tells us that God will teach sinners in the way. David was all too familiar with God's classroom as am I. but the coolest part is that God is willing to teach sinners if the sinner is willing to be taught. it just has to be in His time and in His way.



if only life was this simple. truth is, it could be. you see this label should attached to every baby along with a copy of God's Word before they leave the hospital. that is life's instruction book.

too many times we forget to read the instructions and go off willy-nilly on our own. and we wonder why life is so hard. duh... we forgot to read the instructions!

this is becoming ever more prevelant in my life as I continue to follow my Lord. right now it is in the area of women. true last time I totally messed things up; but I've realized that if God is first BEFORE things start, then I'm headed in the right direction. hence reading the instruction book! I've already decided that should God choose to give me a wife it will only be because she is needed in my ministry and we can perform that ministry more completely together for our Lord. should she not be needed then I am willing to do the minstry alone.

right now, I am testing a certain female that I am interested in at church. the Father, through the Holy Spirit, impressed me to ask her out to soulwinning night... and SHE CAME TO IT. just so you know I'm kinda stoked about it. I will ask her again this Sunday night and it would be nice if she says yes. the Holy Spirit has mentioned to have no expectations just in case she refuses. the Lord MUST be first in this arena should it proceed any farther. if He is not, then any relationship will fail. by placing God first, and reading the instruction manual, it will allow God to have His will in this matter. God must get the glory for my life, including this.


Under Grace

Just try to measure east to west
Or to the oceans lowest depth
You'll find no record of my past
You'll find my Savior’s righteousness

Under grace my guilt is gone
The chief accuser lost the war
The record of my sins erased
Its buried deep under grace

I could not meet the laws demands
But God in mercy had a plan
His Son's own blood my sins erased
My pardon now reads under grace

Under grace my guilt is gone
The chief accuser lost the war
The record of my sins erased
Its buried deep under grace

The record of my sins erased
And it's buried deep under grace
And it's buried deep under grace


a good read

more than a carpenter by josh mcdowell.

it could transform you into being a more effective soulwinner AND possibly win that skeptic friend of yours that refutes Jesus Christ.