family affects

one never realizes how much their family can affect a Spiritual walk until you have taken the step of Faith out and then see with new eyes. I dearly love my family and I would do anything for them within reason. but looking at them now I see two distinct lifestyles - God's and theirs.

God's is influencing my life daily. part of my family can understand and rejoices with me. those members I enjoy sharing what God has and is doing in and through my life. my brother-in-law, saved, rejoiced with me when I told him that God had used me to lead someone to Christ. it was he that also rejoiced when I told him that God had returned 50% of an offering back to me via a dryer - trust me it happened. he in turn edifies me as a brother in Christ.

my blood brother unfortunately is still focused on the flesh and satisfying the lusts thereof. I cannot tell him everything God is doing as he only says that's good and then back to him. he to is saved yet behaves totally different. I am reminded of I Corinthians 6:11, "And as such were some of you; but ye are washed, but ye are sanctified, but ye are justified in the name of the Lord Jesus, and by the Spirit of our God."

Yes, my family is saved but even the redeemed can choose to not be close to God. look at me! for many years I tried to hide. didn't work. if it wasn't for my extended family praying that God would jerk a knot in my tail, as my grandpa would say, then I would probably be dead. thank God He does jerk knots and praise God He does love us. even when we need the knots.

automatic ambassador

december 2007. it began to crumble like cookies succombing to a steamroller. I was realizing that the relationship with the person I had lived with for almost 7 years was swiftly coming to an end. love, or the likeness therof, was no longer evident. I was not flatscreened, widescreened, or pixelated by any means. hi-def maybe but not in the way that provided joy. I knew going into this 7 years prior that it would not last. God, via the Holy Spirit had made that very clear. it was a lust of the flesh that was being satisfied, solely and purely. the Spirit wanted no part in this sin. yet I chose to dive headfirst into it thus dragging Him through it. once in He constistantly whispered how to escape. I chose to ignore. the only reason the Holy Spirit gave voice was because at the age of 14, I accepted Jesus Christ as my Saviour. I trusted in His payment for my sins and gave my life to Him. I was no longer mine own to do as I pleased. little to my knowledge I had automactically become an ambassador. II Corinthians 5:17 tells us, "Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new." a new what? yep, a new creature. see I had given my soul to Christ but had chosen to keep my life for myself. I refused to accept the fact I was a new creature and had become an ambassador.

II Corinthians 5:20 & 21, "Now then we are ambassadors for Christ, as though God did beseech you by us: we pray you in Christ's stead, be ye reconciled to God. For he hath made him to be sin for us, who knew no sin; that we might be made righteousness for God in him." see I enlisted as an ambassador whether I liked it or not. that's why it was crumbling. God was tired of His ambassador serving the prince of this earth, satan. Jesus Christ didn't leave heaven, be born into this world, live a perfect & sinless life, minister for 3 years, die on the cross for my sins, and then rise from the grave only so that I could be redeemed thus to continue in my sin. it wasn't going to happen.

so, december 2007. the beginning of the end? no, the beginning of my reconciliation to God and the start of my fulfillment as an ambassador.